Medicine Bottle
[Sorry for the drawing, it's homemade. i'm a writer, not a drawer.]
We’ve all heard the news that drinking is supposed to be ‘detrimental’ for your health. Right. i’ll give you the ‘mental’, but one of the reasons i drink is for the health benefits.
- Alcohol protects the brain during an accident. Do you get the full brunt of the irony here? The booze that gets you drunk enough to drive your car head-on into a wall protects your brain in that same accident! Just imagine what would’ve happened if you hadn’t drunk…
- Wine is good for your heart. Which means you have a bigger heart. Which means you can love more. (Or make love less, depending on how much you drink.)
- Alcohol reduces the risk of dementia. And old-timers disease. Pickle that brain–quick!
- You should drink around 64 ounces (8 8-ounce glasses) of water per day. Do have any idea how many whiskey & waters that is?
- You should have around 2 cups of fruit a day. By my count, that’s at least 1 good sized screwdriver.
- On top of this, i’m also improving the planet’s health! It’s a fact: the more i drink, the more glass bottles i recycle.
And that’s why we say ‘to your health’ when we toast.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Extra added bonus!
i’m including–at no extra cost–a Pour Man’s Cocktail Recipe related to the subject.
My Fellow Alcoholics, i give you: MediSin (A Drug Cocktail)
MediSin (Cabinet)
Recipe:
- Put a cold capsule in the bottom of a tall glass
- Add ice and 3 fingers of vodka
- Fill glass with multivitamin juice
- Add a shot of cough medicine
- Top of with a throat lozenge and parecetemol
- Stir well and drink to the very bottom
Disclaimer: DO NOT TRY THIS COCKTAIL AT HOME! IT’S DANGEROUS! Only i, Al K Hall, can get away with it.
MediSin
A Drug Cocktail
October 8th, 2009 at 9:51 am
I love how you can see the hemorrhoid creme up there, lol, above the glass! Wheeee! That was taken before I moved here and cleaned up the medicine cabinet, huh.
I was pretty much asleep on the sofa when you were posting this last night, and I recall your warning me to make sure I read this with the understanding that you were being tongue-in-cheek. LOL. Yeahhh, that’s pretty obvious.
Oh the tongue side of this (now I am wondering the origin of the expression…), your whack sense of humor cracks me up!
On the cheek side, I keep thinking, “OMG, he used to take TYLENOL with ALCOHOL!” and I wonder that you are alive right now to type this. Tylenol = paracetemol, pretty much, for your non-Yemeni readers out there.
Also as a public service announcement to your readers, I would like to reiterate the NOT trying this at home!
http://www.olemiss.edu/news/dm/archives/97/9710/971006/971006N2alcohol.HTML
http://www.drugs.com/tylenol.html
http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/Medicine/medicine.htm
http://www.vhl.org/newsletter/vhl1996/96bjtyle.php
http://www.protectpatientsblog.com/2009/07/acetaminophen_tylenol_what_is.html
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2354/does-tylenol-alcohol-liver-failure-plus
That last article is pretty interesting! Plus I like how it is called “The Straight Dope,” heh heh! A quote: “The upshot is that heavy drinkers (two or more drinks per day) who don’t eat can suffer worse liver damage from Tylenol than people who OD on purpose. Of 71 patients treated at a Dallas medical center for acetaminophen overdose, 50 were attempted suicides and 21 were victims of an accidental overdose (Schiodt et al, New England Journal of Medicine, October 1997). The would-be suicides on average took twice as much of the drug as the accidental victims. Yet far more of the latter went into a coma (seven versus three) and died (four versus one). Why? Because most of the accidental victims were alcoholics. Five people–three accidental victims, two attempted suicides–overdosed on less than four grams, the claimed safe dosage for 24 hours.”
October 8th, 2009 at 8:16 pm
Look, i saved it from the garbage can!
October 9th, 2009 at 9:15 am
Yay!! I am so glad!
It WAS a good comment, too! (lol) Kind of makes the others superfluous, I guess, lol, but I am so glad it was in the Spam Can to be saved. Thank you.
October 8th, 2009 at 9:52 am
Huh. I left a huge comment here, hit “submit comment” and poof. No comment. *sigh*
October 8th, 2009 at 9:56 am
Boo hoo. It was a nice one, too.
I had all kinds of witticisms about tongues and cheeks, and a lot of helpful links about how folks out there should REALLY NOT try that at home as mixing alcohol and other drugs, even Tylenol can be fatal.
I don’t want Al to bump into a lawsuit with his wittiness here (which is definitely tongue-in-cheek!!), and want to remind people of the high potential fatal nature of taking even small amounts of medicine like Tylenol with alcohol.
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2354/does-tylenol-alcohol-liver-failure-plus
“The upshot is that heavy drinkers (two or more drinks per day) who don’t eat can suffer worse liver damage from Tylenol than people who OD on purpose. Of 71 patients treated at a Dallas medical center for acetaminophen overdose, 50 were attempted suicides and 21 were victims of an accidental overdose (Schiodt et al, New England Journal of Medicine, October 1997). The would-be suicides on average took twice as much of the drug as the accidental victims. Yet far more of the latter went into a coma (seven versus three) and died (four versus one). Why? Because most of the accidental victims were alcoholics. Five people–three accidental victims, two attempted suicides–overdosed on less than four grams, the claimed safe dosage for 24 hours.”
So, take MediSin at your own risk, kids. (Just to reiterate what you already wrote, Al!)
October 8th, 2009 at 10:11 am
http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/Medicine/medicine.htm
Lists all kinds of medicines that should not be taken with alcohol.
OMG, I know!! I need to get a sense of humor!!! But, just think of me as being a little like Wendy amongst all the Lost Boys, eh? LOL.
October 8th, 2009 at 8:13 pm
i Love You as Wendy! How cute! But i’m more Captain Hooked than a Lost Boy, wouldncha say? That said, i’d like to go back to being a Lost Boy again, but the trip out of Neverland is one-way…
October 9th, 2009 at 9:18 am
Captain Hooked, lol. Yeahhh. Too bad that trip out of Neverland is one way, huh. I’m glad you liked the Wendy thing. I feel the most like her! OMG — maybe that’s my integrated personality. Huh! I’ll have to think on that one. Anything but that bitch, Tinkerbell, though. God she still pisses me off after all these years! :p
October 8th, 2009 at 10:18 am
AAAACCCKKK!!!
OMG, Al. The more I read about alcohol and drug combinations, and also what are considered safe and moderate amounts of alcohol, the more I realize you are actually pretty damn lucky to still be around. ” “Combining drugs, especially alcohol, is very dangerous if you don’t have a physician’s guidance,” Dahl said. “You’re running the risk of serious injury or death.”"
The risk is definitely there. DON’T TAKE MediSin!!! This mans you, too, Al!
Wendy shall now leave Neverland to let the Lost Boys play!
October 8th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
The last time i took it was (long?) before you moved here, babe. Don’t worry, you’re keeping me within earshot of the straight and narrow.
October 9th, 2009 at 9:20 am
Hopefully not TOO straight and narrow!! I have to have a little bit of kink in the road, else things just don’t seem worth it all, eh?
Ohhhhh, that makes me think of things in my life that are fun that I have NOT given up! At least I have that left, eh? Let’s remind me of that later, mmmkay?