Celeb Dregs of the Week: May 1 – May 21, 2011 (or there ’bouts)

Don’t let the shot above fool you or go ahead, i really can’t be bothered to give that much of a shit. What i mean is that this week’s (and i use the term “week” as loose as Jonathan Rhys Meyers’ scratch-and-sniff after a night at the YMCA sponsored Greco-Roman hot tub wrestling festival) dregs…

Charlie Sheen: i Want You for Functional Alcoholic Slurperson

[Press 'Play' for the Charlie Sheen Apocalypse Me theme song: Carlos Santana - #Winning] My Flow Alcoholics, For those of you sober enough to notice or drunk enough to care, my title has officially changed to Temporal Functional Alcoholic Slurperson. As i failed at functioning and quit being a practicing alcoholic (and with all that practicing…

Work With It: Resumé Of A Functional Alcoholic On The Job

NOT from the juiced-box but appropriate for the post: Huey Lewis & The News – Workin’ For A Livin’ My Fellow Alcoholics, Al K Hall, your International Functional Alcoholic Slurperson (FASe) addressing you, members of the Drinking Generation, concerning Functional Alcoholism in the office. The subject popped up, not unlike my zipper during a Keira Knightley…

Dregs Of The Week: Feb 21 – Feb 28

Beer dregs this week, y’all. We got drunk German Protestants, a sword wielding mother, drunk monkeys, cures for alcoholism brewing, a smoking DWI, the Sheen family needing rehab from rehab, the Canadian hockey team’s beer on ice, drunk cops, Playmate butt cleavage, the girls of Lost and kegs more fun… From the juiced-box and dedicated to Margot Kaessmann:…