Celeb Dregs of the Week: May 1 – May 21, 2011 (or there ’bouts)

Don’t let the shot above fool you or go ahead, i really can’t be bothered to give that much of a shit. What i mean is that this week’s (and i use the term “week” as loose as Jonathan Rhys Meyers’ scratch-and-sniff after a night at the YMCA sponsored Greco-Roman hot tub wrestling festival) dregs…

Charlie Sheen: i Want You for Functional Alcoholic Slurperson

[Press 'Play' for the Charlie Sheen Apocalypse Me theme song: Carlos Santana - #Winning] My Flow Alcoholics, For those of you sober enough to notice or drunk enough to care, my title has officially changed to Temporal Functional Alcoholic Slurperson. As i failed at functioning and quit being a practicing alcoholic (and with all that practicing…

Work With It: Resumé Of A Functional Alcoholic On The Job

NOT from the juiced-box but appropriate for the post: Huey Lewis & The News – Workin’ For A Livin’ My Fellow Alcoholics, Al K Hall, your International Functional Alcoholic Slurperson (FASe) addressing you, members of the Drinking Generation, concerning Functional Alcoholism in the office. The subject popped up, not unlike my zipper during a Keira Knightley…