The only exceptional day today was that i spread out my 6 glasses between noon and 10pm. Almost like a real, normal person.
- 4 Bud Lights
- 2 glasses of ‘Red’ wine
i fished this morning with Ol’ Grand-dad (blog slang for my dad). Yes, fished. i’m allergic to exercise, it makes me breathe hard, sweat and my heart beat faster. If i were drinking something and i had that reaction, you’d tell me to stop immediately, right? So it is with exercise, or ‘exer’ as it should be called because it’s a four letter word. The only sports i like are the ones you can drink during: bowling, darts, pétanque (don’t ask), croquet, and fishing.
So anyway, there i was fishing with my Ol’ Grand-dad and he asked me where i was with alcohol. My drinking isn’t a secret from anybody, so it was kinda normal he’d ask. i told him that i was keeping it under control, that i was worried about it but the fact i was worried meant i was on top of it. He said he was happy about that. He reminded me that Sea Gram’s (more blog slang, this time for my mom–you know, Ol’ Grand-dad and Sea Gram) father was a heavy drinker and that his own father was ‘a skid row bum’. He can never really say that without getting choked up.
After this, we went to the only store within 15 minutes of Camp David (Hasselhoff) and he bought me a six pack of Blue Labes (Labatts Blue). (It cost $13–hell, when you’re the only store in the middle of nowhere you get to name your price.)
After four of those i invented, with Sea Gram’s help, a Pour Man’s Amaretto Sour.
- 4 Labatts Blue
- 2 Pour Man’s Amaretto Sour
- 2 ‘Dry White’ wines