Booze Revooze: A Drinker’s Skewed Review of THE LIMITS OF CONTROL


[Click here for a guide to Booze Revooze and the rating system used]

From the juiced-box and the OST: The Black Angels – You On The Run

[This review is a lot better if you press ‘Play’ and read while you listen.]

Ramblings: Outer Limits

Final Proof: 2 Shots

You know how you drink with Jim Jarmusch? You’ve seen Dead Man and Down By Law and you can’t wait to hang with the guy who hangs with Tom Waits, Bill Murray and Johnny Depp. So he gets there and you’re all excited and you sit down at the table ready to have this super intense conversation with the writer of Broken Flowers, Coffee and Cigarettes, and Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai. Then nothing happens. He just kinda sits there and looks at you. And you wanna say something but it’s Jim Jarmusch and he’s so much cooler than you could ever be so anything you say will sound completely stupid so you sip your drink and wait. And wait. And he doesn’t say anything. At all. He looks at you and kinda smiles sheepishly. He says “Wow, it’s quiet in here.” Then nothing else for twenty minutes. Then he tells you it was nice meeting you and stands up and leaves and you have to pay the tab. That’s what The Limits of Control was like.

To be honest, it might be my fault. i was drunk when i saw this movie. i’d had like 5 glasses of wine at lunch, then a pint of lager after work waiting for an Aussie coworker, then another pint outside the movie theater waiting for Miss Demeanor. Then another pint inside the movie theater. Then three bottles of beer during the movie. Alls i can say, though, is i saw this with Miss Demeanor and two other chicks and they agreed with me about what i’m going to write here.

Here’s a shot of the bar inside the movie theater:

So You Can Make A Scene

Jim himself came to present the movie:

The guy who announced Jim said that Jim was reluctant to show up because he was shy. This was the first bad sign. The second was Jim saying that we should look at his movie as though it were a dream. The third bad sign was he didn’t even hang around. He took off, and if he couldn’t stay to watch his own movie…

The Limits of Control is a very minimalist movie. Like Dead Man on downers. There are llllooooonnnngggggg stretches without any dialog and so you have the feeling you’re watching moving paintings. The paintings are very beautiful, but no one wants to look at paintings for 2 hours.

The problem with this movie is you have to be drunk to appreciate it, but then you fall asleep because there’s no action and you’re drunk. The other problem is i was holding in my piss for the whole movie. Finally my bladder exploded so i had to run off to the can to stem the internal peeing and when i came back, i’d missed the only action scene in 116 minutes. That pissed me off.

The Limits of Control reminds me of past lives i’ve never lived. Or a slide show of Jarmusch’s trip into his dreams. It was like having someone else’s déja vu.

Blonde (played by Tilda Swinton) summarizes Jim Jarmush’s approach:

I like movies that are like dreams. The ones where you’re not sure if you saw them or dreamed them. Some movies are best when people don’t say anything at all. Where people just sit and don’t talk.

Then she just sits and doesn’t talk for a real long time…

Buzz Kills (Watch Out for Spoilers)

Sex: 3½ Shots

The best part of the movie, if you ask me. We get some nice shots of Paz de la Huerta nude, which you would expect of someone whose character is called “Nude”. Well, not totally nude because she wears thick nerd glasses.

i think what i liked best about her was how unsymmetrical her body was. Her breasts are slightly different sized and her nipples point in different directions. i find that the things i appreciate most in any woman, both physically and mentally, are the things that make her unique from all other women. There’s a lot of that going on here…

Jim & Paz Outside The Bar None

Tilda Swinton was also in the movie as Blonde. While she may not be a classic pinup, she has a very distinctive edge:

Giving Oscar 'Head'

A Smoke

Drink: 0 Shots

i don’t remember any alcohol in the movie, but then i fell asleep for much of it due to all the alcohol i’d had before and during the movie. Maybe you should just ask Miss D…

A Smoke

Rock & Roll:3 Shots

 

While it’s not truly rock and roll, the soundtrack is very cool. It reminded me a lot of Dead Man, with the saturated guitar rasping out Neil Young style solos. Here’s a complete track listing:

  1. Bad Rabbit – Intro
  2. Boris with Michio Kurihara – Fuzzy Reactor
  3. La Macarena – Saeta
  4. Bad Rabbit – Sea Green Sea
  5. Boris – Feedbacker (Tloc Edit)
  6. Manuel el Sevillano – Por Compasión: Malaguenas
  7. Boris – Farewell
  8. Sunn O))) & Boris – N.L.T.
  9. Carmen Linares – El Que Se Tenga Por Grande
  10. Bad Rabbit – Dawn
  11. The Black Angels – You On The Run
  12. Earth and Bill Frisell – Omens And Portents 1: The Driver (Tloc Edit)
  13. Talegón de Córdoba & Jorge Rodriguez Padilla – El Que Se Tenga Por Grande
  14. Sunn O))) & Boris – Blood Swamp (Tloc Edit)
  15. Ensemble Villa Musica – Schubert 2. Adagio [String Quintet In C, D.956] (Tloc Edit)
  16. LCD Soundsystem – Daft Punk Is Playing At My House
  17. Boris – ” ” (Tloc Edit)

Boring Technical Crap

Written by: Jim Jarmusch

Directed by: Jim Jarmusch

Starring

Paz de la Huerta – Nude

Tilda Swinton – Blonde

Isaach De Bankolé – Lone Man

Bottom Line

Don’t see it. But find naked photos of Paz de le Huerta.