What’s in the store for you this week: Tawny Kitaen is officially charged and a Charger is officially suspected. A Bulgarian politician receives ‘highest’ honor ever, Tennessee applies for Statehood, and New Yorkers get drunk on a wild turkey. Not to mention….are you ready? Here it comes….the Patron Deity of The Bar None: David Hasselhoff! Click below on the title or link below to see it all.
Bulgarians have decided to name their local brandy “Borisovka” after their Prime Minister Boiko Borisov to thank him for nixing plans to increase tax on alcohol. If you want to thank me for keeping this blog regular for over three months, you could name a kind of cigarette after me…
Hard to believe, but the idea of linking booze and politicians isn’t new. Russians did the same with Putin and Vodka:
In an effort to get the “Tennessee: The Trailer Trash State” motto removed from license plates, a Tennessean judge (pro’lly bussed in from San Francisco, or some other hippy sanctuary city) blocked a law that had been on the books since July, allowing gun owners to carry firearms into bars. If you can’t get loaded and drunk in Tennessee, where can you do it?
Citizens of New York City had a lot to give thanks for on Thursday’s Thanksgiving. O’Casey’s Tavern in Midtown Manhattan master-basted a turkey for three days in peach, raspberry, cherry and apple flavored vodkas. The secret ingredient? Georgi, 100-proof vodka. The gravy was also spiked with distilled alcohol.
Speaking of hot women and Thanksgiving, a shout out to Miss Demeanor and the excellent Thanksgiving spread she put on for me and the little Alkies, including homemade pumpkin pie. Normally i avoid Thanksgiving like AA in Utah because it just feels wrong celebrating it in Yeman without my family, but Miss D made me realize she and my kids are my family.
Remember a couple months ago when i posted the Tawny Kitaen mugshot? Well, last Friday she was officially charged with DUI and faces up to 6-months and 1 grand.
While we’re on her, here are some shots:
In a true example of Criminal Justice, Antonio Cromartie was in a San Diego bar the other night and, horror of all horrors, not only witnessed but became involved in a champagne spraying contest between two tables. Probably from a country too poor to pour, Antonio took matters (and a bottle of champagne) into his own hands when he chucked the bottle at the offending group wasting the good stuff. He cracked some guy’s head open and while police may be questioning him, we here at the Bar None are applauding him.
Yes, ’tis true, the Patron Deity of the Bar None was hospitalized last Friday for a ‘seizure’. (You say ‘seizure’, i say ‘power barfing’.) Apparently, he’d been binge drinking for two days straight. Petering out early isn’t like him. He must be getting old. i’m a little worried about his health if he can only go on a 2-day bender. Rumor has it, his camera-girl daughter was the one who called 911. A drink to your health, Hoff. May you be up and back in the bar None before you totally sober up.