XXX-Mas

Our Tree Here in the Bar None

[AlKHallism: Special shout-out to Wayne who provided the above tree this year.]

It is now about 5pm Yeaman time and so far 505 people have staggered into the Bar None. As your tender bartender i just wanted to pop in to remind y’all that the Bar None is open 24/7, 365 days a year because fun does not take a day off so why the hell should i?

Before we get to the good shit, i got this new to the juiced-box for this holiday season: Jimmy Fallon – I’m Gonna Get Drunk Drunk Drunk on Christmas

[Press ‘Play’ for a holiday cheer]

i also wanted to thank each and every one of you personally for taking the time to make me a part of your day today*. And to show you my gratitude, i come as a very bad santa, full of Christmas Spirits and bearing gifts. Unlike the fatter guy in the red suit, i don’t give a shit if you’ve been naughty or nice (though i do have a slight preference for those of you who are naughty)—everyone gets swag here.

Naughty...

...and Very Nice

If you remember my similar Thank You for Coming On XXXMas [that’s what she said] post from last year, then you already know what you’re getting because it’s the exact same thing but at least it’s different.

For example,  i have the wine label wallpaper like last year, but this year it’s much more complete.

To make this image your desktop wallpaper:

  1. Right click on the image
  2. Move cursor to “Set as background”

For the single handed porn surfers, (because i feel you, too, but not that way)  i have this for you:

Instructions same as above.

New to my sack this year, i have something for those of you who are more into candy canes than Holly bushes:

No patronizer left behind.

That’s all for today, my rain-dears. Again, i’m proud that, for whatever reason, you decided to stop in today of all days. And if you dropped by because you were feeling a little lonely or blue, i hope we were able to brighten your spirits a wee dram. Maybe you could scribble a note in the comments section to let others know they aren’t alone, too?

Take care of yourselves and each other. And, more than ever, thank you for patronizing me,

Al K Hall

Functional Alcoholic Slurperson

* Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank You

16 thoughts on “XXX-Mas

  1. I’m jus’ gonna say “you’re welcome” and get back to my left-over Christmas pudding.

    Hope you had a great holiday dude. Nice pron pics too, I’ve added that as my desktop now…

  2. Hey Al,

    Merry XXX mass to you! I think I saw your friend Erin last night in a bar in KC but I was too shy to say hello. So call me In the Lame Boat. I do have an excuse though. My drunk high school buddy was astounded that I have quit drinking. And he was trying to convince me that my problem isn’t alcohol but pron addiction. Like spending 5 hours a day watching pron is a problem. God I hate these sanctimonious pricks.

    Happy Holidays, man.

    • ITSB!

      Thanks for stopping by at the New Year’s party, brother. You really should’ve approached Erin, she’s totally cool and it would’ve made both her and me look like international superstars so next time you get the chance, you gotta promise me you’ll say hello and that you saw her on my blog.

      As for the rest, “Fascinating” (said in a totally Spock tone). Before Miss Demeanor moved in (and even a litt;le after, truth be told) i had my own issues with what you and The Rod have both charmingly referred to as ‘pron’. In my case, i think all of my addicitons (booze, cigarettes, caffeine, pron) have the same psychological root. Cigarettes and booze are the worst. One you find a lovely Miss Boat and she moves in, you’ll see that quitting booze was harder than tthe pron.

      Just my 2 cents, brother. And thanks for patronizing me,

      Al K Hall

  3. Will do.

    Actually, I don’t have a 5-hour-a-day pron habit. My friend did and he was preaching although I don’t see a problem with it. I can see how if you mix smoking, drinking, and pron, you could easily spend 5 hours a day in the cycle of: having a drink, watching pron, followed by a cig until passing out. He was just needling me about it because I wouldn’t approach anyone in that bar. What I do have is a facebook game addiction, which is just a big a time waster and it doesn’t have the benefit of giving my forearms some exercise. Although it does save money on kleenex.

    Cheers to you, Al!

    • Thanks Bianca!

      We look forward to having you. Plus, i’m looking forward to the good shit you’ll be slinging at Girls With Prius Envy.

      Yeah, i thought about you ladies this year. Trying to ‘clean’ this place up a little and make it more presentable for the fairer sexy.

      Thanks for patronizing me,

      Al K Hall

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