Amy Winehouse: RIPped

Amy Jade Winehouse: 14 September, 1983 - July 23, 2011

Directly from the juiced-box and dedicated to Amy Winehouse

[Press ‘Play’ for a bit of truth]

i’m not a hypocrite. i’m not going to spew forth glorious praise and sentimental platitudes about how Amy Winehouse was a great woman. She was not a great woman. She was an incredibly gifted singer, but the talent that came naturally to her in art deserted her when it came to living.

What A Wasted

Neither will i apologize for making fun of her while she was alive (in posts like the Ten Celebrities i Wanna Get Fucked Up With or Celebrity Dregs: Amy Wino) but i can honestly say i wish i hadn’t had the chance to. i wish she had been able to rein in her demons like many other rising stars that stopped shooting in time to become glowing.

The reasons behind her demise will be debated by better minds than mine but i bet it’ll come down to a fatal cocktail of youth, fame, money, art and especially that thing we addicts have or don’t have that most of you cannot appreciate or understand. Like a diseased gene, it eats us alive from the inside and drives us to places we never really wanted to visit but like a round trip, the vicious circle keeps taking us back until our trip becomes one-way.

Not that i’m making excuses for her. Amy Winehouse’s death is as tragic as her addictions but just as avoidable. The money that opened up the floodgates could’ve just as easily built a damn. She had several opportunities to treat her disease, but like a cancer patient refusing chemo or a drowning man ignoring a helping hand, she chose to let the disease get the best of her. And judging from her recent performances, get the very best of her it did.

On a more personal note, Amy’s brutal passing puts things into perspective for me and i must confess to feeling a degree of gratitude over recent choices i have made that helped me break the viscous circle my life had become. In recent posts, i’ve shared Blasts from my Pabsts i was fortunate to walk away from and, of course, who could forget my harrowing suicide attempt. Wading into the afterlife up to my waist helped me get back on dry land and bring with me the courage to take steps—not the least of which are the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous—to control a life that had become unmanageable. It works if you work it so work it, you’re worth it.

Rest in Peace, indeed. May Amy Winehouse find in death the Peace she sought in all the wrong places while alive.

Al’s Drawers

Before i start opening up my drawers, i’d like to put another song on the juiced-box for while you look at the pictures. It’s an original demo that appeared on the deluxe edition of Back to Black and i’m dedicating it to the girl in the last picture at the bottom of my drawers. Amy Winehouse – Love is a Losing Game (Original Demo)

Amy Tragic

Amy Pretty

Click on the Shot for the Wallpaper

17 thoughts on “Amy Winehouse: RIPped

  1. The Amy Winehouse song that got me was “Tears dry on their own.” I remember being blitzed out of my mind, beer bottles sprawled around my apartment after starting with a few margaritas at around noon one Sunday in 2007, watching that video around sunset and identifying with all of it. “He takes the day but I am gone.” I understood that. It was deep. Watching it now, I don’t quite get it.

    RIP Amy.

    • Seems like the kind of line i woulda got when drinking as well. i had a whole heartful of songs that did that for me… The first one that comes to mind is Brandi Carlile’s “Turpentine”.

      Thanks for the comment, brother, and thanks for patronizing me,

      Al K Hall

      • Sad to know we’ll never hear Amy Winehouse cover Lynyard Skynyrd’s “That Smell.” That would have been awesome.

    • Never too soon for the old boat.

      I want to say something profound about this but I really cannot. I agree with you that it was her age and her money that got her in trouble.

      By the time I was 27, I was fully aware that I would one day have to quit drinking but I really didn’t care that much. If the opportunity presented itself, I’d get hammered. I remember I was working at a laboratory as a graduate student when a wise MIT math professor came to visit. We went to dinner with some others and he noticed that I was drinking much more wine than everyone else. I said drunkenly and not seriously “well, perhaps I should quit.” And he said “if you enjoy drinking more than the problems it causes, keep doing so.” He then cautioned that around the age of 40 that I may change my mind. And that’s exactly what happened with me.

      So who am I to criticize a 27-year-old with the same hangup? I’m just glad I did not have the money to indulge the way she did and that I had goals (i.e., obtaining a Ph.D) to keep me on track. To the latter point, I think that is what I like about SMART: that’s one of their tenets. Having goals is what keeps me sober. (At one point, after finishing my Ph.D., my “goal” was to be a functioning alcoholic and I succeeded at that, but it wasn’t what I really wanted to be and my life turned to shit. )

      • Doctor Boat!

        i dunno, what you said seemed pretty profound to me.

        You and i have so much in common it’s freaky sometimes. i was about 27 when i realized that i had a drinking problem / was an alcoholic and i knew i was gonna hafta deal with it but i thought it’d be easier to if i had a few drinks first. Unfortunately, it took a botched suicide attempt at 47 to make me rethink my concept of the thing.

        i totally see your point, though, about the 27 year old thing. What’s mysterious is not how many rock and rollers die at 27, but how many survive it. If you had given me the job and wads of cash in my late 20’s, i wouldn’t be here blabbering. i’m just pleased as alcohol free punch that both you and i came out the other side of that shit.

        Thanks for patronizing me, Brother,

        Al K Hall

        PS i hyperlinked SMART just in case one of my readers wanders down this deep (’cause my readers are very fucking deep) looking for a clue to safer drinking.

  2. Ami didn’t “die”, but has been dying for a long time and finally succummed. She was messed up before her talent made her famous, but clung to the wrong advantages of fame (you know the enablers). I am glad that you were able to find a lesson in this, because the thing that shocks me is those in her circle will cry about the waste and yet it doesn’t shock them into sobriety (and these were the people who were there to pick her up from the barroom floor). There is an irony to her biggest hit.

    • Wayne!

      True words indeed. ‘Course it’s easy for me as i already made the decision beforehand, but you know me, even if i’d still been drinking i couldn’t have condoned her life style or said i’d stop drinking. i was lucky to have reached a point after my failed suicide that made it that i could no longer be cavalier about my drinking, but thank god i can still be cavalier about others’ drinking. Still, it’s a lot less funny when someone heads down that road and doesn’t come back.

      Thanks for patronizing me, brother,

      Al K Hall

  3. I really wish she hadn’t died, I really want to kick her ass right now. Blah. I’ve been trying to come up with a blog post for her death but all I can come up with is “Amy Winehouse has died, that is all.”
    Great blog post AL!

    • Thanks Bats!

      You could start off your blog post with something like, “Amy Winehouse has died but I haven’t and Al K Hall cares more about me than he does her, so it could be worse.”

      Or not, your call, lol. 😉

      Thanks for patronizing me, Bats,

      Al K Hall

  4. What a terrific post, Al. So truthful, and poignant — especially putting in the individual photos as you did with her youthful, beautiful photo at the end.

    I hope she has found some peace.

    I loved this sentence of yours: “The money that opened up the floodgates of could’ve just as easily built a damn.”

    Indeed. A tragic story, all the way ’round.

    ” It works if you work it so work it, you’re worth it.”

    You definitely are, my dear Al, so keep on working it. I wish Amy could have… she was worth it, too.

    • Thanks M’Dear!

      So nice to see you poking your little kitten nose in around here from time to time.

      And thanks for quoting the sentence with the typo (that i’ve since fixed). Lol. Glad you appreciated it in spite of it, and thanks for the props.

      Off to bed and see you there.

      Thanks for patronizing my life,

      Al K Hall

  5. Pingback: » Vale – Christopher Mayer, GD Spradlin, Michael Cacoyannis, Polly Platt, Amy Winehouse Fernby Films

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