From the juiced-box and dedicated to Reese Witherspoon, Zooey Deschanel, Kate Upton and Cara Delevignge…
Aerosmith – Love in an Elevator
[Press ‘Play’ for “Drunk in an elevator / Throwing it up after tossing it down…“]
Have you ever played that game, “If you could invite any 5 living people to a dinner party, who would it be?” Well, imagine you play that game, and then those 5 people ended up having dinner together. Freaky, right?
You know me (and if you don’t, you ought to know better), i’m not as intelligent as you, so i don’t play that game. When it’s not with myself, i play “What four people would you like to be stuck in an elevator with?” After years of perfecting my selection, i came up with the definitive list of four people i want to be stuck in an elevator with and it’s this:
- Cara Delevingne (because she’s on every list i’ve ever invented ever)
- Zooey Deschanel
- Kate Upton
- Reese Witherspoon (i bumped off Jesus to include her)
All drunk, of course.
Even more surprising than the perfection of this list is the fact that it all came true, even the drunk part. Here’s the video proof of that.
That vid is also all the proof i need to know that Reese Witherspoon doesn’t read my blog. i already said once in a post where i talked about Cara Delevingne being a LUSH (Lesbian Until Sober Honey), that the correct pronunciation of her name is “Car-ah De La Vagina“. Well, Reese was unaware so when she met Cara, hilarity ensued when she tried to pronounce Cara’s name. Also because she was drunk.
Speaking of her name, here’s a sound bite of Cara pronouncing the alternate, non “de la vagina” version of her name:
i have also come to the official conclusion that Cara Delevingne is not a L.U.S.H., but a young girl playing with the notion of bisexuality and everything else she can get her hands on. i do have photographic proof of that as well, of course.
Anyway, there’s tons of NSFW shots of this hot mess at the very bottom of these dregs.
Have you thanked your booze today?
Bar None Dregs
Go here for a complete list of all my websites on one page so you don’t miss out on any of my shit.
From simple fan to simpleton blogger, my pupee, my mental, my proto-gay Saint Pauly’s website is building an audience in its own right. Let’s face it, he’s funnier than i am and i’m not just saying that because his WTF!? website is taking off and i have to stay on his good side.
Check out this review of another hot bisexual, if you don’t believe me.
Al K Hall’s Drawers
What follows is NSFW. You’ve been warned, and you shouldn’t be reading the above shit at work anyway.