0-5 Shots: GODZILLA (2014)

Godzilla 01 poster (Bar None AlKHall)

From the juiced-box and the film: Elvis Presley – Devil in Disguise

[Press ‘Play’ for what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas]

Ramblings: Goodzilla

Final Proof: 3½ Shots

3  & 1-2 shots

You know how you get drunk with an old friend? He’s cool and brings something for you to drink and lets you pick the tunes and he’s been with you a long time so he’s as familiar as your favorite booth in the corner bar. Hanging out with him is nice because you know him so well you get comfortable right away and settle into your routine and even if he’s taken steroids and some speed with his drink, he’s still the same old guy you’ve always been able to count on. Godzilla is that old friend.

Godzilla 02 (Bar None AlKHall)

There’s a lot to like about this Godzilla dude. Sometimes there’s movies i really look forward to seeing, only when i get there i usually wind up all disappointed because these super heroes and monsters and robots don’t live up to their own hype. In the end they always have some fatal flaw that ruins it for me and i usually end up wishing they’d made the movie i wanted to see and not the one they showed me. The good news here is that Godzilla delivered what i wanted and, while he didn’t impress the shit out of me, at least he didn’t let me down.

Godzilla 03 (Bar None AlKHall)

It’s a solid movie with a good story and pretty fast paced, which means there’s more than just one action scene at the beginning and at the end. The actors do their acting thing even if none of the roles really are that much of a stretch for anyone. Bryan Cranston can act without even trying and here he doesn’t have to. Sally Hawkins is as cute as an English button but all she has to do is walk around and act surprised.

Godzilla 05 (Bar None AlKHall)

The big shock in the cast? Elizabeth Olsen (the non-twin) delivered the strongest performance of the film other than the monster. Sure, she cheated a little because “Elle Brody” is the only one in the movie that has any emotional range, but at least she didn’t drop the balls when exploring her character’s depth.

As for the special effects, they were often pretty good. However, the reason i stopped at 3½ shots here was because the action was sometimes a little muddied and the monsters’ fight scenes were often filmed in dark, smoky conditions and i suspect this was to “hide the wires” rather than for moody realism. Still, overall, the action was decent and regular, and the not so special effects didn’t hurt the film all that much.

Godzilla 04 (Bar None AlKHall)

Basically, if you think you’re going to like Godzilla, you’ll love it, and if you think it’s going to suck, you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised.

Buzz Kills (Watch Out for Spoilers)

Sex: ½ Shot

1-2 shot

Elizabeth Olsen is the younger, taller, hotter sister of Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen (the mini bookends that were the darlings of American TV and kids’ movies). They didn’t age as gracefully as their untwin and they can’t act as well, either. Basically, Elisabeth got the looks and the talent, which is normal when you think about it because the twins had to share everything they got in two.

Elizabeth Olsen 00 (AlKHall Bar None)

Elizabeth Olsen is bending over in the middle

Let me just say again, though, that the 1 shot here has nothing to do with her talent. Elizabeth really came through multiple times in Godzilla and proved she’s more than just a pretty face i hope to see a lot more of.

Unfortunately, whoever directed this film (Gareth Edwards) decided to concentrate more on the monster special effects than sex and more on his PG-13 rating than nudity. In your nutshell, this means this wallpaper is hotter than anything you’ll see of her in the film.

Elizabeth Olsen Bar None Wallpaper

Elizabeth Olsen Bar None Wallpaper (Click on the shot for a wallpaper)

There’s some more single shots of her hanging out deep in my drawers, so just scroll down until you hit pay dirty.

Also hot in this movie is Sally Hawkins who i’ve been crushing on forever, like since i saw her in this one English movie called Happy-Go-Lucky because she’s a good actress and cute and has a constellation of moles i’d like to spend all night drawing out and naming one time.

Sally Hawkins 2014-05-14 Bar None Wallpaper (AlKHall Bar None)

Sally Hawkins Bar None Wallpaper (Click on the shot for a wallpaper)

i put some shots of her down in my drawers, too. Including one cool one of her moles.

A Smoke

Drink: 0 Shots

The only time we even see booze is when Ford Brody (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) has some wine with his wife (Elle Brody / Elizabeth Olsen) when he comes back from a tour of duty in the Navy.

Elizabeth Olsen

A Smoke

Rock & Roll: 4 Shots

4 shots

The real reason i went 4 shots on the action was that there was a lot of it and it lasted throughout the whole movie. Much of what they put up on the screen, though, was a little confused and dark so i felt a little cheated like maybe whoever fucked up Pacific Rim could have come here and done just the action scenes because those were the best part of PR.

 Godzilla 06 (Bar None AlKHall)

Remember, there are spoilers here!

  • It takes 45 minutes to see a monster, but there is action before that
  • There are a couple of surprising deaths, which is a real plus for this film. It also serves to keep us focused on the monsters
  • There are 3 monsters here: A boy Muto (giant spider cricket), a girl Muto and Godzilla
  • Godzilla kicks ass like a boss, and is the true hero of the film

Boring Technical Crap

Godzilla 07 (Bar None AlKHall)Written by: 

Max Borenstein (screenplay)
Dave Callaham (story)

Directed by: Gareth Edwards


Elizabeth Olsen – Elle Brody
Sally Hawkins – Vivienne Graham
Bryan Cranston – Joe Brody
Aaron Taylor-Johnson – Ford Brody

Another Round

A much better review of a much worse film

Booze Revooze of “301”

WTF!? Review of a movie with a similar poster

Haven’t Had Your Fill of the Booze Revooze? Click here for another round.

Al K Hall’s Drawers

What happens in my drawers stays in my drawers, and is often NSFW!

Elizabeth Olsen

Elizabeth Olsen 01 see through (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 02 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 03 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 04 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 05 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 06 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 07 (AlKHall Bar None) Elizabeth Olsen 08 (AlKHall Bar None)

Elizabeth Olsen 09 in the Bar None (AlKHall Bar None)

Elizabeth Olsen getting hit on by some old guy in the Bar None

Sally Hawkins

Sally Hawkins 04 (AlKHall Bar None)

Click on this shot to zoom in on her moles

Sally Hawkins 01 (AlKHall Bar None) Sally Hawkins 02 (AlKHall Bar None) Sally Hawkins 03 (AlKHall Bar None)

Sally Hawkins 05 in the Bar None (AlKHall Bar None)

Sally Hawkins in the Bar None

Sally Hawkins 06 in the Bar None (AlKHall Bar None)

Sally Hawkins in the Bar None: Cheers!

Haven’t Had Your Fill of the Booze Revooze? Click here for another round.

2 thoughts on “0-5 Shots: GODZILLA (2014)

  1. Pingback: » Movie Review – Godzilla (2014) Fernby Films

Leave us some tips!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s