As of right now, 403 patronizers have found there way into the Bar None, and you can add one more because i’m here with you. i know you have the choice of a lot of places to go and get shit faced today, and that you chose my corner of the internet means a lot to me. May the season find you happy and safe and full of a lot of cheer. Though maybe not as much as Santa.
But before we pass on to that… From the juiced-box and dedicated to Kris ‘Krispy’ Kringle: Big & Rich – Drunk on Christmas
[Press ‘Play’ for “Santa, I’ve got the family blues…I need some Christmas spirit, and by spirit I mean booze“]
Want more of the same? Here’s a Bar None Christmas juiced-box play with yourself list:
As nothing’s too good for my Patronizers, i supply a lot of nothing. And i’m not the only one. Remember the Bar None Piss List from yesterday? Guess who stocks that party.
But wait, what’s wrong with Santa this year? Is he bummed because he confused your wish list with his shit list? Not exactly, but when this photo of him punishing a girl who’d been extra naughty surfaced…
…he found himself in water hot enough to send Mrs Claus into a meltdown.
i still don’t get what she sees in him, though, because he’s this obese reindeer fucker and she’s hot enough to melt Frosty.
But how did Santa get so fucked up? What about his little helpers? Well, about that…
Them elves is some mischievous little fuckers. And Famous.
From all of me at the Bar None, thank you for patronizing me this year, and i’m looking forward to serving you all through 2015.